Mad Scientess Jane Expat (nanila) wrote,
Mad Scientess Jane Expat
nanila

Things I'm Looking Forward To Doing Now That I'm British: Number One

In order to get myself to write, I'm making a list of Things I'm Looking Forward To Doing Now That I'm British, to be posted daily.

1. Lying outrageously about distances. When a British person - especially a Londoner - says to you, "Oh, that restaurant/bar/attraction is only a five minute walk from here," you should NEVER EVER believe them. Take that number and multiply it by two. If you're not fully able-bodied and/or willing to run there, multiply by four. When I was five months pregnant, someone told me - and despite having lived in the UK for years, I believed him - that a place was "a fifteen minute walk from here". It took an hour for me get there.

So I apologise in advance to all the people who are about to get royally cheesed off with me when I tell them that Piccadilly Circus is "a ten minute walk" from South Kensington. Because no, no it isn't. Not unless you're fucking flying.

This entry was originally posted at http://nanila.dreamwidth.org/891445.html. The titration count is at comment count unavailable.0 pKa.
Tags: england, expatriate, immigration
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