He he he
Just think how much chaos you could have caused the authorities if you had been found dedded on the moors.
Detective #1 : "Well Symonds, this Jane Doe couldn't be a simple accident because she has nothing on her nethers. Someone must have stripped and redressed the body."
Detective # 2: "So its someone who collects tops, undies and toothpaste as trophies".
Pathologist #1: Guys you don't need to roll out all the resources this has a perfectly simple explanation.
*Points to scan showing the state of Jane Doe's liver*
Det#1 & Det#2 "Ahhhhhhh"
My God, you mean he force feeds them alcohol first? Why, the fiend!
[later, on the 6 o'clock news:]
Well-coiffed presenter: And now, from the Peak District, breaking news. Authorities announce the emergence of a new serial killer, one with a very specific profile. Currently, s/he's called the Scientist-targeting-sherry-deploying-pants-and-fleece Ripper. For more, we go live to our reporter in Upper Lower Little Windringbottom. Over to you, Clyde...
Clyde: thank you, Araminta...
If there a training course I can take to become you guys, cos you're just awesome :D
[PRE-EDITED TO ADD: Aw. That is such a nice thing to say. Come down from the peanut gallery and join the giddy silliness! The following is the result of: jet-lag, too much coffee, and the poor idea of listening to NPR while half-awake getting ready for work...]
Alas, it looks like BBC will have to cut: New Drama Series Development, TV News Show Presenter Development, and Complete Internet Smartarse Development.
They won't be able to import any from the USA, because of the new immigration laws. (How a bunch of Oxbridge grads think that was a good idea, considering who staffed their colleges at university is a mystery, but xenophobia will do that to even the most well educated of persons, long live the Empire.)
In a way, that wouldn't help much either, since the US Congress is hell bent on getting rid of similar programming in Public Media in the United States, and that means we are going to have very few English language internet smart arse training courses available to us in the future outside of Canada and Australia. And since they are better known for other specialities, that doesn't look good for us.
Unless the Emir of Qattar (who owns Al Jazeera, which has an English branch), or Rupert Murdoch become very, very generious in media smart arse training, we may be looking at a very grim future for silly commentery on blogs.
Of course, you can always do what Abe Lincoln did, and pull yourself up by your bootstraps and then work out your silly internet commentary lessons on a shovel back, with charcoal, from your log cabin in Kentucky. He was kind of witty, actually!
Edited at 2011-03-21 02:28 pm (UTC)
I do not think I can add anything of substance to this thread that will make it any more awesome.
Therefore, I will simply opt to add an adorable photo of Sandra Oh in fairy wings, tempting Cookie Monster with her confectionery.
I love Cookie Monster's expression, which I interpret as, "Lady, you're sweet and all, but if you don't fork that cookie over RIGHT NOW I shall be forced to nom you and your dress."
I love the linzer cookie decorations on her top! Now I want jelly filled cookies.
Mmm, yes. Want Jaffa cakes.
Thank god I am not the only person to whom these things happen.
Were you also walking the hills in a sports bra and fleece only? Oh, please say you were!
Sadly, no. That would have been pretty cold. The wind was bitter and the sunshine isn't quite powerful enough at this time of year to counteract it. I borrowed a thermal top from the bloke!
Well, that certainly makes any of my walks pale by comparison. You are a veritable walking heroine, m'dear!
Edited to add:
Does this mean however that next time you go walking you will concentrate so hard on not forgetting these things that you will end up packing only toothpaste and underwear? And tops, I suppose, although that's not quite so entertaining.
Edited at 2011-03-22 01:59 am (UTC)
At least I didn't have to carry a 1-year-old on my back as well. That task fell to the bloke, to help out one of our companions (who was carrying the 3-year-old) & his wife. I inherited the rucksack. We worked out later that the 1-year-old weighed only marginally more than the rucksack. It turns out that water is heavy.
I don't think I will concentrate so hard that I remember only toothpaste and underwear. I think I will probably get drunk again. As becala
reminded me, the same thing happened when I went to Paris last summer, which means it isn't my fault. It's the underpants gnomes.
I think you should embroider a packing list in the lid of your suitcase/rucksack/overnight bag.
6. advil (for the hangover)
I hope that it was at least warm enough to walk topless and there wasn't a breeze to make going commando easier. And I doubt the bloke complained too much :)
Warm and no wind on Kinder Scout? In March?
I suppose at least there's less laundry to do when one ends up in peat bog up to one's arse.
At least I remembered my waterproof hiking boots. One of our company was wearing white & green Converse. Well, she was at the start of the walk, anyway. You can imagine what happened to them.
I had to borrow a thermal top from him. The wind is still pretty bitter up there at this time of year!
Thanks to Moonpig...
I might have to try that sometime.
What's being a real grown up? ;)
If I ever find out, I'll let you know.
Good god, how can one compete? You are one brand of clever, your friends--another.
Wish to see a snapshot or three of your expression when you realized what you did, & did not pack for your trip, pls thx. Reenactment?
I will do my best to provide. Probably not til the weekend, though!
But exactly. We were with the bloke's research group, too. I suspect they were not impressed by my elegance and composure.
Somedays I think, wow! I did the laundry, cleaned the bathroom, picked up all the crap in the living room, made a bank deposit, picked up mail from our business mailbox. And then a day later, remember I forgot to pay several bills. argh.
It's a never-ending battle, this "trying to be a responsible adult" business. Most days I want to give up on it.