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Mad Scientess Jane Expat

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Deeds of Derring-Do | Full of Wild Inaccuracies and Exaggerations

Why The Bloke Is A Bad, Bad Man [20100329|20:56]
Mad Scientess Jane Expat
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[the weather today is |harrumph]

Since I don't yet have a UK driving license, the bloke drove us to Wales this weekend in order to climb the Brecon Beacons. My role in the car is to provide entertainment for the bloke so he doesn't fall asleep. Normally this consists of things like reading him the newspaper or a book, telling him amusing stories, or choosing music for the stereo. Sometimes, though, it just consists of being American.

For instance, the roads in England are a constant source of bafflement. No matter where we go when we leave Cambridge, we seem to have to take the A14. I don't understand how one road can be simultaneously northbound, southbound, eastbound and westbound, but the A14 seems to manage it. This results in conversations such as the following.

Him: "Bugger. I missed the turning."
Me: "Oh no. Can we turn around at the next exit?"
Him: "Yeah, it's just a pain."
silence while we reroute
Me: "So are we on the A14 again?"
Him: "Yeah, but we were before, too."
Me: "Wait, I'm confused. What was the road we were just on?"
Him: "The A14."
Me: "And the one we're on now?"
Him: "The A14."

Please note that the wrong road was not the A14 going in the opposite direction. It was a different road going roughly the correct direction.

Me: "Tell you what, I'm just going to shut up until we get to the M6."
Him: "You can't do that, I need you to navigate."
Me, under my breath: "Where did I put the little cake that will get me out of the rabbit hole?"

Later, I told him a story about a work telecon.

Me: "So then I told her--"
Him: "Wait, say the woman's name again?"
Me: "It's pronounced 'NAH-zee'."
Him, incredulously: "Spelt N-a-z-i?"
Me: "Er, yes."
Him: "Please tell me that's an abbreviation."
Me: "Uh huh. For 'Nazilla'."
Him: "Surely you'd go by 'Nazilla' if you had that name."
Me: "You know, I've happily been typing 'Dear Nazi' and 'Thanks, Nazi!' for three years without thinking about it because it's pronounced 'NAH-zee'. Now I'll never be able to write it again without feeling horribly uncomfortable. THANKS A LOT."
Him: *snigger*
linkReply

Comments:
[User Picture]From: chickenfeet2003
2010-03-29 20:36 (UTC)
Nazilla is far worse. It sounds like a dinosaur about to invade Poland.
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[User Picture]From: nanila
2010-03-31 20:00 (UTC)
It conjures an amusing mental image. I can definitely see her stomping on buildings and chucking cars around if sufficiently provoked.
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[User Picture]From: sekl
2010-03-29 22:54 (UTC)
Oh come on. Unless you're Churchill there's no way you're getting the two confused.
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[User Picture]From: nanila
2010-03-31 19:57 (UTC)
True. You'd have to take my e-mails pretty far out of context to be offended by them.
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[User Picture]From: cosmiccircus
2010-03-30 00:08 (UTC)
You guys seem like a fun and cute couple, who are perfectly suited for one another! :)
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[User Picture]From: cosmiccircus
2010-03-30 16:02 (UTC)
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[User Picture]From: nanila
2010-03-31 19:54 (UTC)
It's excellent when science is adorable as well as useful, isn't it?
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[User Picture]From: slutbunwalla
2010-03-30 03:58 (UTC)
oh no he has some kind of unfortunate side? I don't believe it!!
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[User Picture]From: nanila
2010-03-31 19:50 (UTC)
Shocking stuff, I know. I don't think he believes it either.
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[User Picture]From: bellelaqueen
2010-03-30 09:45 (UTC)
I too am regulary confounded by the mystical way in which the same road can go in many directions and also exist in more than one place simultaneously. I swear when driving the A40/M40 London to Oxford on my previous regular commute, I would pass an exit for the same A road about 4 times.
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[User Picture]From: nanila
2010-03-31 19:52 (UTC)
Oh yes. And what about the times when the signs on a roundabout seem to show that you can get to an A road or an M road from multiple exits??
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[User Picture]From: mysti77
2010-03-30 11:10 (UTC)
lol, sounds like fun :)

Do you think you'll get your driving license here/drive here eventually? I find it very confusing myself but then I'm thinking maybe when I start to drive it will make more sense? I don't get to convert my permit from Trinidad so have to sit over the test etc. Planning to do all of that before I have the baby so I'll let you know how it goes. On another note, does your bloke drive automatic or manual transmission? I find it really strange that most people here seem to drive manual. We drive automatic mostly in Trinidad (except the young boys who want to race!). I never learned to drive manual but having to learn it all now as Alex's car is manual and I'll probably have to use his until I can buy my own.
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[User Picture]From: bellelaqueen
2010-03-30 14:04 (UTC)
I drive an automatic. I was not designed to drive a manual car *LOL*
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[User Picture]From: mysti77
2010-03-30 15:04 (UTC)
I somehow think I'm not designed to drive a manual car either, but it seems I may have no choice in the short term :( It's too much work!
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[User Picture]From: nanila
2010-03-31 19:45 (UTC)
I have to agree. I'm not fond of manual transmissions.
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[User Picture]From: nanila
2010-03-31 19:49 (UTC)
I'm going to have to get my driving license here, I think. Even though there isn't much call for me to drive on a daily basis, I think it'll be better if it's at least an option. My license doesn't convert either, so I'm going to have to take the test again too.

The bloke's car is a manual transmission. (It's also awesome - it's one of the old Citroens with hydraulic suspension, so it has to be given time to rise up before it starts.) So yeah, I'll have to drive a manual. Technically I know how, but I'm not very comfortable with it so will need to practise a lot!
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[User Picture]From: senusert
2010-03-30 15:18 (UTC)
The Brecon Beacons are most fun to climb at night! Which one did you go up?
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[User Picture]From: nanila
2010-03-31 19:44 (UTC)
We did three that were next to one another: Cribyn, Pen-y-Fan and Corn Du.
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[User Picture]From: danaid_luv
2010-03-31 02:02 (UTC)
*snickers* Loving it all. *is twelve*
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[User Picture]From: nanila
2010-03-31 19:44 (UTC)
Twelve? That makes you older than me when he pulls this kind of stuff. I revert to about five and have to repress tantrums.
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[User Picture]From: jixel
2010-03-31 14:21 (UTC)
nozzi/nasi/nazi is a perfectly common farsi girl's name. just that too many are stupid with the transliterated spelling to know any better

as for the a14, this is all i got you http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A14_road_(England)
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[User Picture]From: nanila
2010-03-31 19:43 (UTC)
I found that link fascinating. I am a little ashamed.
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