togusa: it's all rubbish

Day 92/183: Have you tried turning it off and on again?

Ill Communication: A Very Short Play



Upper Management: How do you all feel about having calls to your currently inaccessible campus work phones forwarded to your mobiles?

Us: Our personal mobiles?

UM: Yes.

Us: That would be an emphatic no.

UM: OK, how about having calls redirect to your Skype for Business accounts?

Us: That would be acceptable.

UM: Great! Here are instructions on how to set that up through the IT portal.

Us: We've all tried and none of us have that option available to us.

UM: Oh dear. We've opened a service desk request on your behalf to correct that.



~~~Three Weeks Later~~~



IT: We've fixed your issue! Please log out of Skype for Business and log back in, and then you'll be able to redirect your calls.

Us: Um, so, we've all tried, and what you've done is enable calls to be re-directed from our Skype for Business accounts to our currently inaccessible campus work phones. We still don't see the option to do the reverse on the IT portal.

IT: ....Ohhhh, is that what you wanted? Sorry.

Us: ...



We're going to be back on campus full time before this gets fixed, aren't we.

me: ooh!

Day 90/183: Local Voters’ Pamphlet, such fun

It’s that time again! Yes, the time when [my USian state] sends out its election materials and paper ballots to postal voters, for the primary elections taking place in August. I love the voter pamphlet and read it avidly from cover to cover, even for the districts I'm not eligible to vote in, because every chancer under the sun has popped their head up to run for office. Since “state candidate statements are printed exactly as submitted to the [redacted] State Secretary of State’s Office,” without censorship, correction, verification or editing, some of their statements are A M A Z I N G. Not the established politicians’ ones, of course, those are formulaic and boring. But the chancers are great. And bonkers.



Here is a selection of my favourite offerings.


The "Setting the bar low" award


Community Service: I've never been to jail.


The "I wanted to laugh at the rest of this but it turned out to be fucking tragic" award


Community Service: Despite personal problems, I have managed to avoid going to Court, except for driving without insurance. To be fair, I was living in the car at the time…


The "Hard pass based on the fewest words" award


Statement: Stop [City] / King Fascism with idiotic face!

This was repeated for several paragraphs, with an exhortation to “vote Trump” at the end. NOPE.



The "Really has it in for the rodents, wtf" award


Statement: De-list the pocket gopher, it’s not endangered. End this pocket gopher nonsense.

There’s pocket gopher nonsense going on? Do tell. Sadly, they don’t elaborate.



The "5G conspiracy" award


Statement: If elected, I will direct an independent, state-funded study of the effects of 5G cell-phone towers upon living things. My research indicates that this radiation is killing trees, birds, honey bees, human life.


This person is also against a load of stuff: chemtrails, bio-mass use for electricity, wind power, solar power, coal trains, eugenics, Satan, off-shore drilling...and the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation. It’s unclear what they’d do about any of it other than vigorously opposing it, though. I’d particularly like to know what they plan to do to fight Satan whilst in office. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯



The "This started out OK if a little extreme, AND THEN" award


Statement [no other information was submitted]: I am running as a spokesperson for the anti-apartheid / reparations-now movement. My issues and solutions: 1) Raise awareness that [redacted] State is Native American land, and should be returned. Colonialism is no longer acceptable. 2) The current Governor’s biggest mistake is turning [City’s] building over to proven historial Negro vampire criminals.


I don’t expect to see any of these candidate statements in the November election, but if they do appear on the ballot then things have got even worse than I imagined. USian readers, do you have any choice tidbits from your state voter pamphlets? Please share them in the comments if you do!
me: abby

Day 86/183: Friday's Unscientific Poll: The Return of the Best Incompetent Vampires

Poll #2102601 What We Do in the Shadows returns

What is the state of the Nanila now that Series 2 of "What We Do in the Shadows" is now available on BBC iPlayer?

Ecstatic
10(100.0%)

Yes, so I'll see you in a few weeks after I've watched every episode multiple times until I have them all memorised.
kusanagi: amused

Day 85/183: (every day is) Caturday

20200613_125917
I wish to reassure readers that His Lordship is not suffering unduly due to the escalation of building works at our house. In fact he is developing a bit of a tum as a result of extra rations/treats being distributed by soft-hearted builders who are wrapped around his noble paws.

This entry was originally posted at https://nanila.dreamwidth.org/1299713.html. The titration count is at comment count unavailable.0 pKa.
me: ooh!

Day 84/183: Friday’s Unscientific Poll: The Great British Sewing Bee 2020, Semi-final

Now we’re down to the last four contestants, it’s time to re-run the Great British Sewing Bee poll! I’m also attempting to get over the fact that we’ve dedicated two evenings in a row to staring at light fightings trying to work out the best arrangement for the kitchen and outdoors, and I’ve just dropped over £200 on the ones we selected. I may need a glass of wine or three to be able to cope with the idea that I’m now apparently a person who cares about light fittings.



Anyway.



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me: wrong side of the mirror

Day 81/183: Shed’s dead, baby. Shed’s dead.

20200527_091618
The bloke knocked down the old shed the weekend before last to make way for the new shed. The Polaroid above is in one of two pretty paper notebooks that the bloke brought back on his last trip to Delhi before the lockdown. I take a pair of Polaroids every few days, and file them to make a Covid diary for each of the children as a memento of this peculiar time.

20200529_144111
Here you can a very happy man in his fancy metal shed. It has power sockets and light switches and a work bench. We celebrated the new shed’s arrival with our first takeaway food in 2.5 months, which included our first chips and ice cream (not consumed simultaneously) in the same duration. This is because we don’t currently have a functioning freezer, for reasons too dull to elucidate. The takeaway was from our local pub, which has just reopened for said purpose. Anyway, we wolfed down our burgers and chips and gobbled up our desserts with indecent haste. Food that someone else had made has never tasted so delicious.

Finally, here is a photo of Telstar on the wooden bench in our garden, taken by the bloke with his fancy new iPhone.

received_866579563850888

This entry was originally posted at https://nanila.dreamwidth.org/1298554.html. The titration count is at comment count unavailable.0 pKa.
me: ooh!

Day 80/183: Golden hour sun flare

Golden hour sun flare
I do have a proper update post half-written but I'm too tired to finish it tonight. Please have instead a photo of Keiki and Humuhumu walking home along the canal towpath on a warm, late spring evening, in the golden hour.

This entry was originally posted at https://nanila.dreamwidth.org/1298379.html. The titration count is at comment count unavailable.0 pKa.