?

Log in

No account? Create an account
Wish to advise on amusing sights I have seen recently. - Sauntering Vaguely Downward [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Mad Scientess Jane Expat

Serious Business | Flickr
Bounty Information | Wanted Dead or Alive: Mad Scientess Nanila
Deeds of Derring-Do | Full of Wild Inaccuracies and Exaggerations

Wish to advise on amusing sights I have seen recently. [20150205|19:49]
Mad Scientess Jane Expat
[Tags|, , , , ]

Exhibit (A): The baby-changing room at the Bullring shopping centre in Birmingham. It is nice and clean and very orange. It also has a spinning disco ball above the changing table. Which, apart from actually being rather good at keeping baby mesmerised, is just so very Brummie. (Shiny metal sign reads: "In the interest of safety, please do not leave your child unattended on the changing facility".)



Exhibit (B): British Waterways public notice on a bridge over the canal.



I consider this worthy of a full transcription [parenthesised comments by me]. It reads: "British Waterways Board*: The waterways are meant to be used and enjoyed by the public. It is an offence to:
  • Waste water by interfering with locks and sluices [Fair enough]
  • Ride a bicycle or bring a vehicle on the towing path without a permit [A vehicle I can understand, but I wonder how many cyclists know they're supposed to have a permit! And where exactly to obtain one?]
  • Obstruct the towing path
  • Damage the canal or towing path
  • Interfere with boats
  • Leave litter [Hollow laughter. Also, someone please tell that to the people who put their dogs' poo in plastic bags and then hang the bags from the hedgerows. Speaking as one of the people who cares for a section of hedgerow next to her back garden: NO. NO NO NO. You have taken a problem - people leaving their dogs' poo in public places - and made it worse by rendering it immune to the process of decomposition. I DO NOT LIKE YOU.]
  • Pollute the canal [More hollow laughter. And please tell it to the people I see using sticks to flick their dogs' poo into the canal instead of bagging it up and taking it away like decent responsible dog-owning human beings.]
  • Fire guns or throw stones [I don't want to meet the person who would go duck-hunting with their shotgun on the canal.]
  • Ride a horse on the towing path (unless it is a designated bridleway) [I've walked a fair few miles of the towpath and have yet to encounter any sections that are bridleways.]
  • Bathe in the canal [WHAT DEAR LORD NO]
  • Fail to obtain or display an appropriate licence or river registration on craft navigating the waterway"


* Now the Canal and River Trust

This entry was originally posted at http://nanila.dreamwidth.org/962556.html. The titration count is at comment count unavailable.0 pKa.
linkReply

Comments:
[User Picture]From: cmcmck
2015-02-05 20:27 (UTC)
A baby disco! :o)

BWB do have a tendency for silly signage!
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: nanila
2015-02-12 09:23 (UTC)
I guess the Canal and River Trust haven't got round to replacing the signage yet. I can't imagine it will happen swiftly.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: imyril
2015-02-06 10:35 (UTC)
Heh. By the time you get to 'bathe in the canal' the subtext of 'because we know you're ignoring EVERYTHING ELSE WE'VE ASKED YOU NOT TO DO. Also, diesel' is quite loud :)

And I love the disco ball. That's genius. Also, very Brum.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: nanila
2015-02-12 09:22 (UTC)
Haha, I wasn't even thinking of the diesel, though that's likely present in greater quantities than duck and dog poo.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: bryangb
2015-02-06 10:45 (UTC)
The requirement for a cycling permit was abolished some years ago, I'm afraid! I believe it was when the British Waterways Board became the Canal & River Trust in 2012.

See https://canalrivertrust.org.uk/contact-us/faqs/cycling

Before that, I believe permits were free and could even be downloaded from the BWB website. But no, I didn't have one, nor do I know anyone who had one. (-:
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: nanila
2015-02-12 09:16 (UTC)
It's a relief to know that, since the bloke and I have been cycling merrily - and permitless - since we moved here in 2012! :D
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)